somedays, you're worshipping in a field; other days, you're standing on the side of the highway, getting sunburnt while you wait for a tow truck...
Car trouble wasn't something I was expecting when Joanne and I drove back to Fredericton after an amazing three days of worship and music at East 2 West Festival last weekend.
It started modestly. Joanne was driving and the car started to handle a little strange, as if it was struggling to keep a consistent speed. The deterioration happened fast from there. The best way I can describe it is to say the car stuttered - it would get up to 110 km/h, go for a few minutes or so, then the speed would drop and no matter how hard you pushed down on the gas, it kept dropping and dropping until you had to pull over because you were doing 60 km/h on the highway.
The dash was lighting up, the car was struggling to move forward and I was equal parts stressed out, concerned for our safety and frustrated that, once again, my car was on the fritz.
I drove along the shoulder of the highway, four-ways on, until we were just outside Gagetown. That's when I caved and called a tow truck. We were getting into a stretch of highway with too many exits, too many merges and too much truck traffic. It wasn't safe to keep going.
I made it back to Fredericton about three hours later than expected, $125 poorer and feeling exhausted from waiting out in the hot sun. We dropped the car off at the garage, which was closed because it was Sunday. There were ideas thrown around about what caused the car to fail so spectacularly, but there weren't any decisive answers.
Normally, this would have driven me crazy. I like having answers and solutions and knowing what's going on.
Instead? I felt peace. Calmed. At ease. It was so evident my partner even pointed it out.
"You've had an amazing amazing weekend worshipping God. No wonder the enemy is like "mmm nope". Just remember how amazing He is."
Laura Cooper
Here's the thing: I'm certainly not happy that my car is acting up again. I'm not looking forward to paying for whatever repairs it needs this time and, as someone who likes having answers, it's difficult not knowing what's going on.
But I am certainly certain that God is good in all circumstances. I've seen it - in the good company I had with me along the side of the road (especially considering before Joanne bought tickets, I was going to go to the festival alone); in the advice and help offered by family when the problems began; in the kid at the gas station who tried to help us by making a funnel out of a bottle so we could pour methyl hydrate into the gas tank (long story - didn't work, the methyl hydrate or the funnel. It was the thought that counted!); in the reasonable price tag on the tow; and in the generosity of Joanne's husband, Matt, who leant me his car while mine is out of commission.
I could be upset, but the reality of the situation is I have far more to be grateful for.
All that said, I'm still a little nervous about the car. This week has been interesting - the diagnosis was the gasoline we received from the Petro-Canada station in Riverview was dirty and it clogged up our fuel filter. We had that replaced, as well as an O2 sensor, but the car is still struggling to get over 2,000 RPM right now. The recommendation at this time is to burn out the gas in the tank, fill it with better quality gas and see what happens. Hopefully that will fix the problem but the reality is it's an old car - about 13 years old to be exact - so who really knows? My partner and I have already started having discussions about a new vehicle, although I remain hopeful we'll be able to get a little more out of the green beast before it's just too much to maintain. Whatever the case, I know this is very much in God's hands.
In the meantime, I'm going to do about the only thing I can do, the only thing worth doing - I'm going to trust him.
Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:6-7
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